Wednesday 1 July 2015

Hudson-Patrick Tan Test ©

It was rather sunny earlier today....but it looks like the sea fog has just rolled in.

Eric Hudson had his legs out at the station showing off his suntan, he’s been in Tenerife - he's always in Tenerife!; Roger Patrick had his shorts on too trying to get a tan, he’s also been in working somewhere exotic - Corfe Mullen. 

It's fair to say Eric beats Roger hands down on the tan - by way of comparison.

Eric's legs


Roger's legs


Terry's head is as brown as a hot cross bun, although without the cross, and no raisins....or orange peel come to think of it. Duncan was looking slightly pale, but he's a teacher and gets the next 16 weeks off on summer holiday so plenty of time to catch up.

Tom looked quite brown which is odd given he works nights, sleeps during the day and is scared of the sun; not a big fan of garlic either I'm told.


In order to stop disputes as to who is the brownest I’ve decided to implement the Hudson-Patrick Tan Test © which will be based on a colour chart by a well known wood stain manufacturer, rather than chicken legs.

This will allow HM Coastguard tans to be graded fairly.

At the moment Eric’s legs are somewhere between an ‘Oxford Brown’ and ‘Saddle Tan’, whereas Terry’s bonce is closer to ‘Redwood’ than ‘Sequoia’.
I’m afraid Roger's legs are currently ‘Cape Cod Grey’ although he’ll probably be ‘Harvest Brown’ by mid July.


Oh the Coastguardy bit, make sure you take care in the sun and cover up betweeen 11:00 and 15:00 when the sun is at its hottest. ...What sun I hear you say!

1 comment:

Jackie Lane said...

Very very funny :)